Thursday, February 3, 2011

Shoulda Woulda Coulda

I shoulda been cleaning the basement. I am at a standstill though. My wonderful hubby brought home the trailer like I asked. There it sits empty. In my driveway. Somehow dragging up crap from the basement stairs, through 5 feet of snow, put it on the trailer (if I can find it now under 10' snow drifts) to go to the dumpster at our office doesn't sound like fun. Soooo.....

I decided on starting a new project. Cleaning of my personal tribe of pygmy slobs rooms. So began 2 days of being trapped in the house with my tribe of pygmy slobs. Lots of whining and crying. Thank goodness it didn't seem to bother them at all. The first day I started with the girls room. Girls are cleaner right?! BWAHAHAHAHA! I must have gotten the broken models. Okay, so your butt is the size of a postage stamp but put it in the hamper. I found dirty underwear EVERYWHERE! One pair was even being used as a bookmark, I think. I found it stuffed in the middle of a book. I mean who reads a book, says hey I have to eat some candy before mom finds it in my room and uses their undies to mark their spot? Do you take them off? Do you find a pair? What?!

The amount of candy wrappers that I found is unbelievable. I immediately made them an appointments for dental check ups. OMG! We have a rule, NO FOOD IN BEDROOMS. In a fit of anger after bending over to pick up the 5,783rd candy wrapper off the floor I called the children in.

"Isn't there a no food rule in the bedroom?"


"Why am I finding all these candy wrappers in here then?"

"Candy isn't food"


"Weeell.... when we try to eat candy in the morning you say not til you've had some food".

This is where my head splits open and that head that can shoot lasers out of her eyes and fire out of her nostrils appears.


I felt pretty good about this statement. I could just imagine if I had stopped at the mouth the boy certainly would of grabbed one of his sister's toys and put it in his mouth declaring it food and banishing it from their rooms. Thus resulting in his sister in a fit of tears and screaming. You know one of those little girl screams where it goes directly to your tail bone and shoots straight for the sensitive parts of your brain.

"So.... we can have candy for breakfast now?"

Pzooo Pzoooo

The little voices in my head just lasered one small child.

You know I always wondered why when we buy the kids really cute clothes, I see them wearing the same thing every day. I found out why. They won't look for a shirt. They just grab the first one on top and work their way down. Laundry day comes, clean goes on top and the things on the bottom get ignored. Some really cute things too. I started going through their clothes to get the ones that don't fit but they still insist on wearing out. 2 garbage bags of clothes to go to Goodwill JUST from the oldest girl. Don't say keep them for the little one either. I will forget that I have them or they will be totally out of style and she'll refuse to wear them. Besides I pulled, just out of the girls room, 7 loads of laundry! As much as I love to spend a week doing laundry, I don't need any more to wash.

I haven't even gotten to the boys room. Lawd knows what you will find in there. His room doesn't seem so bad though. A good part of his floor is showing. I do need to repaint his closet though. It's pink. Pepto bismol pink. The bitty one loves it. I found her in there playing cause she likes the "pink room".

Now that the room is somewhat cleaner, I have found that the bitty one has drawn on EVERYRTHING. The walls, the furniture, the drapes, the sheets.... Nothing has escaped her reign of terror. It is a good excuse to redo somethings. I have some ideas. I need to get another dresser for them. Or switch dressers. Or rent them apartments.

I also need to organize. Part of the problem is I just blow up and tell them to clean. They need to have places to put stuff and something to contain stuff. So I have been looking at some storage ideas for kids.

Any ideas besides shipping them off to Grandma?


Happier Than a Pig in Mud said...

Stay strong Maggie, the little ones can smell fear!!! If you get that whole organization thing worked out, let us know, ok:@)

Lori said...

You just crack me up! I have 2 girls and my 15 yr old is a total slob! I can totally relate to what you're saying. Good luck with the organization.

Lori : )
Thrifty Decor Mom

Lisa@Pickles and Cheese said...

This made me laugh because it is all so familiar! Just today I made my son go through his room with me....candy wrappers and Gatorade bottles everywhere...dirty hair...and dust. Augh! It's better now but we need a new system!

Southern Lady said...

Your house sounds like mine! I vote for shipping them off to grandmas (for a little while only). LOL :) Carla

Mary said...

I'm a grandma and I can tell you from experience that they (the grandkids) are welcome if they arrive with one small suitcase. Anything more than that and they'll be shipped to summer camp :-). You already know that it will get worse before it gets better, so I won't go there. Be forewarned that it may never get better with boys. You have to pray they marry well or neat. I'm new to your blog and must tell you what fun I've had here today. I'll definitely be back. On a more positive note, snow doesn't last forever. Have a great evening thinking of the thaw. Blessings...Mary

Theresa said...

you're really starting to freak me out...are you sure they're YOUR children? They must be...mine are older, I'm pretty sure of that. The underwear, oh. My. Goodness. ::head desk::
Yes, I feel your laser beams...

Chrissy said...

Oh I can totally relate, you took me back a few years though. However, it isn't much better when they are teens, I have the no food rule too, it doesn't matter. I think if it eaten after 6:00 PM, it must not be food? Wow, I wish it worked that way, because then it wouldn't have any calories either.
As far as the wash goes, I have a never ending stream of it at my house, with more to add if I go look for it. Please let me know if you come up with the organization trick.
Thanks for making me smile today.

Dragonfly Treasure said...

OY! I think every Mother can relate! When my 2 youngest boys hit their teens I gave up and now keep the doors closed! If they want to live that way then I don't want to see it. TJ thinks once you can see a bit of the floor it's clean! And what a collection of empty bottle in Codys room! He could probably pay the house off with that stash...did I say stash? OOHH I must have meant trash!! LOL
Have a great day ear Mags!
p.s. dontca wish you would have worked on the basement now?!

Lori said...

OMG Maggie ~ this one kinda made me glad that I have four legged kids!! You make me snort out laugh and I love you for that.

Tanya said...

Thank You...thank you for sharing the truth about what really goes on in houses with kids! HA! I can relate anyway! Underwear as bookmarks topped it though! HA!
I couldn't wait to tell you....2 of my daughters and I hit Marshall/Home Goods today....looking for those infamous Stone Gable plates! Rats...only found 2 mustard colored ones. Didn't buy...will keep on the look out! You lucked out finding yours. I love those! I'm not giving up! Looking forward to a great post with your new dishes! I think I want to be Yvonee too! ;0)
Your blog is good for my soul!
Warm hugs,

PBKISSES said...

Ok- I see I am commenting right after my sweet sis in law. And she's looking for those plates too! Anyway, I am so there on the organizing/cleaning kids rooms. SO TRUE! At our house, it's SOCKS. EVERYWHERE! I'm pretty sure everyone only has two feet, but from the looks of it, at least one of them must be an octopus. Your blog is a blast! Love it!